Just Not Tonight
by MG12CSI16
Summary: 'She'll find delight and then she'll be alright, she'll be alright, just not tonight.' Life takes its toll and decisions are made in the heat of the moment. GSR.


I had a major GSR craving today so I just had to write something. Inspiration came from Rob Thomas' Her Diamonds. Set somewhere in season 12

Reviews are great, I love hearing what you guys think!

I own nothing.

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**Just Not Tonight**

She had stormed into the house that night, the smell of whiskey and cigarettes following her as she went. The rain was beating down outside, drumming against the window with a dull thud. He could see it in her eyes that something was wrong but she didn't want to talk.

Grissom remembered following her into the bedroom where she stripped off her damp clothes and slipped into one of his tshirts and a pair of boxers. He asked her over and over about what had happened but all he got was the same answer.

"I'm fine Gil, leave it alone." He watched Sara walk into the bathroom and slam the door behind her. He sat on the edge of their bed and sighed, massaging his temples with his hands. He looked up when the door flew open again and Sara stepped out, tears running down her porcelain cheeks and her hands clenched into fists.

Grissom stood up but he didn't speak, she had something on her mind. He could see it in her eyes, those mocha colored orbs that seemed to see right through him.

"You know Gil, I think I might be done this time." Her words were slurred and her movements jerky, the effects of the alcohol he could still smell on her making themselves present. Grissom furrowed his brow and watched her with interest.

"With what Sara?" A throaty, humorless laugh escaped her slightly parted lips.

"Being a CSI, I'm done. Its too much and I don't think I can take it anymore." Grissom stood in front of her, unmoving. He gnawed on his bottom lip and pushed his glasses farther up the bridge of his nose. He didn't know what to say, he knew Sara loved her job but he couldn't ward off the feeling he may lose her again. Because this time he wouldn't be able to handle it.

"Sara honey, you're not thinking clearly. Maybe you'll feel differently in the morning." he reached a hand out and tried to steer her towards the bed but she shrugged him off.

"No I'm serious. I can't stand seeing the bad guy walk or the looks on the families faces when we tell them about their kid or their wife or their brother." She knew she wasn't thinking clearly but she didn't care, she was so mad and saying these things felt so good.

She remembered storming out of work and going straight to the bar, drowning her sorrows in whiskey and cheap cigarettes until the bartender called her a cab and sent her home to her husband.

She felt her mind wander again and her head spin from all the whiskey in her system, but Grissom's voice seemed to pull her back when her name rolled effortlessly off his tongue.

"Sara you've dealt with all these things for so long, are you sure you're ready to quit now?" he was making this too difficult.

"Gil, I love this job, the feeling of speaking for someone without a voice and giving justice to their family. But I can't stand seeing all my work get thrown out and ignored while the guy gets to walk. It's not fair." Grissom opened his mouth to speak, cut off by Sara's hand being raised to cut him off.

"Don't start with the life isn't fair crap because trust me I know it isn't." he couldn't hide the smile tugging at his lips as they both sat down on the bed.

"That's not what I was going to say, but you are right." Sara glared at him through narrowed eyes.

"What were you going to say?" She asked. Grissom turned his body so they were face to face.

"That if you were absolutely sure that you want to quit then I'm ok with that. Sometimes it's time for a change, and I think you've earned that change." Sara stared down at her hands resting in her lap, then back up at Grissom.

"I don't know what to do," she admitted, shrugging her shoulders while toying with a lose string on her shirt.

"Then think about it tomorrow after you've slept off the alcohol. It's not helping you're situation as it is." Sara nodded and stood up, walking to her side of the bed. She settled under the blanket and pressed herself against Grissoms body. He wrapped an arm around her waist and pressed a kiss into her hair.

As she finally allowed herself to relax she felt the tears pooling in her eyes before spilling down her cheeks. The ragged sobs escaped her lips, hurting her chest. Grissom could feel her body shake against his and held her tightly.

She rolled over in his arms and buried her face in his chest. Grissom could feel her tears soaking through his shirt as he rubbed soothing cirlces on her back. After a few moments her body stilled and her breathing became even. She sniffled a few times and rested her head against Grissom again.

"Are you alright Sara?" the genuine worry in his voice made her smile as she snuggled closer to him.

"I will be."


End file.
